Tambahan seminit kuliah hcp18

tulisan dr zainudin

Sedikit perkongsian kenapa kita susah nk main bawah 90 berdasarkan pengalamn peribadi:

  1. Kita tidak bermain mengikut handicap kita ttp cuba bermain hndicp rendah
  2. Sebab itu pada setiap hole kita cuba nk regulation termasuk Par 3
  3. Sepatutnya kita bermain dgn handicap kita

– tee off tk perlu sekuat hati mcm low handicapper utk jauh
– second shot pukul dgn memastikan semua teknik d jaga spt stance, direction, club dan bukan paksa diri utk on
– bila bola apron cuba chip dgn baik, jaga semua teknik dan bukan utk masuk lubang terus
– bila put pun sama jaga semua fundamental dan jgn paksa 1 put
4. Bila semua dh dilakukan saya yakin utk main 90 adalah possible
5. Tinggal jaga lubang index je – index d beri krn mmg hole tsb susah Formula mudah: teeoff fairway – 2nd shot apron – chip on the green – 2 putt bogey all the way = 90
mngkn dlm salah satu hole kita dpt par = 89
2 par = 88
3 par = 87 Just
pandangan utk peningkatan dn kesihatan mental 😎😎😎

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Pengalaman prof najib

Kenapa sukar dapat skor bawah 90 ..
Beberapa driving meraban masuk semak.
Beberapa bola masuk bunker naikkan skor tak keluar dgn sekali pkl
Putting 2 footer tak masuk lubang. Why?
Kurang skill. Kurang praktis. Kurang nasib.
Sekadar pandangan pagi sebelum weekend berapi2 nak masuk gelanggang.

Dr rahim menokok

Masuk semak pasal lama x nyabit
Masuk bunker lama x nyangkul
Two footer x masuk sbb putt by one foot
Tu nak test skill lepas praktis 200 balls tp nasib xde..
Kalau dah tau gitu yg pegi ngade2 main gop buat ape…anyway Gop utk kesihatan n happy2

celah celah kehidupan alam

Pantun malam …

Kamsaini kirim pantun

Malam ini malam jumaat… Ibu2 nak kena ingat.. Bapak2 siang dah penat Mlm jumaat bapak nk rehat.

Anak2 jgnlah bising… Bapak penat ..hati pun runsing… Siang hari dah mcm gasing… Darah naik ..kepala pun pening…

Ibu2 carikan ubat… Agar bapak segera d rawat.. sakit pinggang n sakit urat… Ambil segelas air.. Bismillah Slawat…

Ibu2 yg baik hati… Urutlah badan smpi ke kaki… Kalau mmg sayang kan laki… Jgn ngelak..alasan d cari.

Kena urut ..bapak pun segar.. Badan lesu..segar bugar. Mata pejam..pintu d langgar.. Pujuklh tido..d dlm gebar.

Pagi subuh bapak pun bangun… Bapak bangun tersenyum2… Wajib mandi jgn tayamum… Dirikn solat..isteri jd makmum.

Lepas solat bapak berdoa… Pnjgkn umor..nk tambah dua… Ibu pun amin..dia tk dengar… Tambah rezki..tmbh semua.

…pantun kasih..mlm jumaat.😜😜😜 jumaat

poster fbn

Bidaah malam jumaat

Kiriman prof Tn Baharom – KGUTM

Dialog suami sunni vs istri wahabi seputar sunnah-bidaah

Pada rabu mlm khamis, suami istri sdang mluangkan masa d ruang tamu.

Isteri : abang.. esok khamis mlm jumaat kan ☺?

Suami : ye.. knp 😃?

Isteri : esk abang dduk je la d rumah.. tiap2 mlm ke surau.. lagi2 mlm jumaat.. dok buat bidaah baca yasin… sesat tu bang… masuk neraka…

Suami : eh eh… pandai2 je awak ni… mana ad sesat…. kan baca quran tu… kan dlm quran allah suruh kita bca quran ?

Isteri : mmg la dlm quran allah sroh baca quran… tapi nabi x buat pn kan bacaan yasin mlm jumaat? Tu bkan sunnah.. ianya bidaah.. sesat.. masuk api neraka….

Suami : laa.. xksah la nabi buat ke tidak.. tp dlm quran ada dasarnya secara umum sroh baca quran… maka ia bkan bidaah… tp sunat… baca quran kan?

Isteri memberontak dan merajuk krana suaminya telah sesat sebab baca yasin malam jumaat…. suaminya tido seorg diluar malam tu…

~~~~~~~~

Keesokkan pagi, mereka x btegur sapa…. suami pg ke kerja dan istrinya awal2 lg ke rumah jiran, cek kiah untuk mngumpat cek nab…..

Pada pkol 6:30 ptg si suami pulang dri kerja…. si suami memanggil istrinya…. lalu istrinya dtg dlm keadaan nak tak nak…

Suami : yang…. abang rasa selama ni abang dalam keadaan sesat la…. 😔

Isteri : hah!!! Sedar pn!!! Baik awak taubat sekarang…. tp knp tiba2 awak bole “dpt hidayah” ni?

Suami : td abang dgr ceramah d tmpat kerja… ustaz tu kata POLIGAMI tu sunnah nabi… nabi buat… abng menyesal lah kahwin sorg… bidaah.. sesat ni sbb x ikot nabi.. abng xnk msuk neraka… abang pn xnk heret syg masuk neraka skali sbb kesesatan abg kerana kahwin seorg…. tlg sign jup *sambil tunjuk borg poligami

Isteri : hah 😱? Apa abg ckap ni….😡? Kahwin sorg xlan sesat kot… kan quran kata kita bole kahwin 1 dan 2 atau 3 atau 4 jika mampu….? Abg xyah nak ngada2 kahwin lagi ye!!!

Suami : mmgla dlm quran secara umumnya kahwin 1 ada asasnya…. tp nabi x buat…. jd ianya bidaah… sesat.. neraka tu….

Isteri : *terdiam mcm monyet 🙊… xlah abg… mana ad cmtu… xkan islam sesempit itu?

Suami : hahahahahahahahahahahahaha….. tu la awak…. ikot lagi wahabi yg kononnya sunnah sgt… pastu kerja mngumpat…. ajak pg dgr ceramah dri ulama xnak…. saya saja berkias la…. borg ni pn saya yg taip sendri.. saja nak test keilmuan dan kesunnahan awak tu…. mcm tu la quran mngajar kita…. slagi ada dasar dalil… sesuatu amalan tu x sesat x bidaah walaupn nabi xbuat… xda ke nerakanya kalau baca yasin… yg ke nerakanya ialah mengumpat…. dah… saya nak bsiap ke surau…. nak “buat bidaah” baca yasin ni….

Isteri : *dgn penuh malu… ye la bang… syg mnx maaf…..syg dah faham metod fiqah islam.. baca yasin x bidaah… syg nak ikot jgak baca yasin… jom jom…. mlm ni abg xyah tido luar lagi… mlm jumaat kan? ☺😊😚😘😍

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Poster FBN

OMG

Kiriman Azman – KGUTM

  1. When ur life is in darkness……
    Pray 2 God and ask Him 2 free u from darkness….. and
    If u r still in darkness..Pls pay ur TNB bill.

  2. When a man opens the door of his car for his wife,
    You can be sure of one thing;
    Either the car is new or the wife.

  3. An angry zzzz man entered a shop and shouted :
    Where’s my free gift with this cooking oil?
    Shopkeeper : What free gift??
    zzzz man : Oi, here got put “Cholesterol FREE!”

  4. If u need ADVICE, SMS ME,
    If u need DARLING, CALL ME,
    If u need HELP, E-MAIL ME,
    IF U NEED MONEY, Nombor yang anda dail, tiada dalam perkhidmatan KAMI.

  5. What’s the difference between stress, tension and panic?
    Stress is when wife is pregnant,… Tension is when girlfriend is pregnant.
    Panic is when both are pregnant.

  6. Grammar Teacher: Do you know the importance of a period?
    Kid: Yeah, once my sister said she has missed one, my mom fainted, dad got a heart attack
    & our driver ran away…

  7. A young boy asks his Dad :”What is the difference between confident and confidential?
    Dad says: “You are my son, I’m confident about that. Your friend over there, is also my son, that is confidential.

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Thinking out of the box…!

Shared by Hj Ramli Ibrahim – PPP UTM

These were the few questions asked during HR interview in late 80s & early 90s by multi-national companies… The answers were really stunning and inspiring…….. Thinking out of the box…! A must READ ….the BEST ANSWERS received.

Question 1:

You are driving along in your car on a wild, stormy night, it’s raining heavily, when suddenly you pass by a bus stop, and you see three people waiting for a bus:

  • An old lady who looks as if she is about to die.

  • An old friend who once saved your life.

  • The perfect partner you have been dreaming about.

Which one would you choose to offer a ride to, knowing very well that there could only be one passenger in your car?

This is a moral/ethical dilemma that was once actually used as part of a job application.

He simply answered:

“I would give the car keys to my Old friend and let him take the lady to the hospital. I would stay behind and wait for the bus with the partner of my dreams.”

Sometimes, we gain more if we are able to give up our stubborn thought limitations. Never forget to “Think Outside of the Box.”

Question 2:

What will you do if I run away with your sister?

The candidate who was selected answered ” I will not get a better match for my sister than you sir”

Question 3:

Interviewer (to a student girl candidate) What if one morning you woke up & found that you were pregnant.

Girl: I will be very excited and take a day off, to celebrate with my husband.

Normally an unmarried girl will be shocked to hear this, but she managed it well. Why I should think it in the wrong way, she said later when asked.

Question 4:

Interviewer: He ordered a cup of coffee for the candidate. Coffee arrived kept before the candidate, then he asked what is before you?

Candidate: Instantly replied “Tea”

He got selected.

You know how and why did he say “TEA” when he knows very well that coffee was kept before.

(Answer: The question was “What is before you (U alphabet) Reply was “TEA” ( T alphabet)

Alphabet “T” was before Alphabet “U”

Question5;

Interviewer said “I shall either ask you ten easy questions or one really difficult question.

Think well before you make up your mind!” The boy thought for a while and said, “my choice is one really difficult question.”

“Well, good luck to you, you have made your own choice! Now tell me this. “What comes first, Day or Night?”

The boy was jolted into reality as his admission depends on the correctness of his answer, but he thought for a while and said, “It’s the DAY sir!”

“How” the interviewer asked,

“Sorry sir, you promised me that you will not ask me a SECOND difficult question!”


Sometimes just thinking out of the box is all it takes

Org tua vs awek cun

Kiriman jimmy ngow – golfer UTM

workout-routine

A 55 yrs old man asked the trainer in the gym
Old man : i want to impress that beautiful lady over there
Which machine should i use ?
Trainer : outside the gym there is an ATM machine use that…..

Bukti sayang

Kiriman Hj D – KGUTM

jom pakat baca:
Suatu Kisah…
Seorang nenek mencuri dengar perbualan sepasang remaja yang tengah dating di taman.
: Awak sayang saya?
: Sayang laa…
: Kita sudah bercinta 4 bulan, apa buktinya?
: A B C D E F G
: Apa tuu?
: A Boy Can Do Everything For Girl.
: So sweet…
Si nenek yang dengar tadi rasa jealous & frust sebab dia dah nikah 40 tahun tapi suami dia tak pernah buat macam tu. Lalu si nenek terus pulang & bertanya pada si Atok.
: Bang, awak sayang tak dengan anje?
: Eh… mestilah.
: Buktinya apa?
: Laa… kita kan dah bersama 40 tahun.
: Ahhhhh… tak best, anje nak bukti yang ada huruf A B C D E F G!
: Ooo.. ok untuk anje, abang bagi A B C D E F G H I J K lah…
(Si nenek happy sangat, yang bercinta 4 bulan cuma dapat A hingga G tapi dia dapat A hingga K)
: Apa tu A B C D E F G H I J K?
: Anje ni seorang yg… Amazing, Beautiful, Cute, Dynamic, Elegant, Fantastik, Good, Hightech…
(Si nenek suka giler mendengarnya, sambil tersenyum si nenek bertanya lagi)
: Yang I J K tu pulak apa?
: I’m Just Kidding.


Cut n paste citer kwn